扯淡地球史

yep, its me.

1.The ancient Greeks invented lots of things we still have today, like medicine and olives, and lots of things that have died out, like democracy and pillars.

2.Hunting animals every day was a pain in the arse until someone came up with the idea of also eating plants, which were easier to catch because they couldn't run away. This simple act of laziness led to the invention of farming.

3.Humans turned animals they couldn't eat or ride into pets if they were pretty enough.

4.Ancient people invented currency to make life on Earth easier, but in doing so, they inadvertently invented capitalism, which is gonna kill eveyone.

5.But disaster was just around the corner, because the Romans had converted to a religion of peace just in time to have their arse handed to them by some people who mainly believed in hammers and smashing. They were the Vandals, an ancient group notorious for their appetite for destruction, like Guns N' Roses.

6.Why do humans need to believe in something bigger than ourselves? Is it so we don't feel quite so fat?

7.Jesus was killed because people didn't like what he was saying. So could you call him the first celebrity victim of cancel culture?

8.What's ironic about Jesus Christ becoming a carpenter was he was actually named after the two words you're most likely to shout after hitting your thumb with a hammer.

9. The Crusades sound very violent. Why can't the religions all learn to live together in peace like they do in Ireland?

-I think if you find someone who knows the answer to that question, then you should definitely, publicize it as soon as possible.